Birth Trauma Counselling in Hitchin, Hertfordshire
Specialist counselling and EMDR therapy for birth trauma and PTSD after childbirth. Support from someone who truly understands birth - both as a counsellor and former birth doula.
What is Birth Trauma?
Birth trauma refers to the physical or emotional distress experienced during childbirth that leaves lasting psychological impact. It's not about whether your birth looked "traumatic" to others - it's about how you experienced it.
Birth trauma can happen even when:
- Your baby is healthy
- There were no major complications
- Others say "everything went fine"
- You had a "normal" delivery
What matters is how the experience felt to you
Common causes of birth trauma include:
- Feeling unheard or disrespected during labour
- Loss of control or dignity
- Unexpected interventions or emergency procedures
- Inadequate pain relief
- Rushed or insensitive care
- Fear for your or your baby's life
- Traumatic delivery (forceps, ventouse, emergency C-section)
- Separation from your baby after birth
- Inadequate postnatal care
- Previous trauma being triggered during birth
You might also experience birth trauma if:
- You're a birth partner who witnessed a difficult birth
- You had a previous traumatic birth
- You experienced pregnancy loss or stillbirth
- Your baby needed intensive care
How Birth Trauma Counselling Can Help
Birth trauma counselling provides a safe, confidential space to:
Process what happened
Talk through your birth experience with someone who understands both the medical and emotional aspects. Make sense of what happened and why.
Reduce trauma symptoms
Using evidence-based EMDR therapy, we can help your brain process traumatic memories so they no longer feel overwhelming. Reduce flashbacks, nightmares, and anxiety.
Heal emotional wounds
Address feelings of guilt, shame, anger, or grief. Work through the gap between the birth you hoped for and the birth you had.
Rebuild confidence
Regain your sense of self and confidence as a parent. Address any bonding difficulties with your baby.
Prepare for the future
If you're considering another pregnancy, we can work through your fears and prepare you for a more positive experience.
Support your relationship
Birth trauma can affect relationships. I offer support for partners too, and can help them process what happened so that you can all reconnect as a family.
What to Expect
Free 20-Minute Consultation
We'll have a friendly, no-pressure chat where you can:
- Tell me briefly what brings you to counselling
- Ask any questions about the process
- Get a sense of whether we're a good fit
- Discuss practical details (sessions, fees, etc.)
First Session (90 minutes for Birth Debrief)
If you choose to start with a birth debrief, I offer an extended 90-minute first session. This gives us time to:
- Hear your birth story whilst being mindful of triggers
- Understand what was most difficult
- Explore your current symptoms
- Discuss your goals for therapy
- Create a plan for moving forward
We won't rush through your experience - this is your time.
Ongoing Sessions (60 minutes)
After the initial session, we typically meet weekly for 60-minutes. We'll:
- Continue to process your birth experience
- May use EMDR to reduce trauma symptoms
- Address any other issues that arise
- Work on bonding, relationships, or other concerns
- Build coping strategies
- Prepare for future pregnancies if relevant
How long will therapy take?
Everyone is different. Some people find 6-8 sessions very helpful, others benefit from longer-term support. We'll review your progress regularly and work for as long as it is useful for you.
When Should I Seek Help?
You can seek help at any time:
Immediately after birth
You don't have to wait. If you're struggling in the early days or weeks after birth, reach out.
Months or years later
Birth trauma can surface long after the birth, especially when triggered by anniversaries, medical appointments, or another pregnancy or even when people close to us become pregnant. . It's never too late to get help.
Before another pregnancy
If you're planning another baby but fearful because of a previous birth, counselling can help you process the trauma and prepare for a more positive experience.
If you notice that your experience is affecting your relationships
Sometimes we think we are okay, but then realise that we aren’t connecting with our baby as we expected or partner as we used to. This can be a sign that we need some support.
When you're ready
There's no timeline for healing. Come when you're ready.
Other Ways I Can Help
Preparing for Birth After Trauma
If you're pregnant again after a traumatic birth, my Mama Bear Birth Prep programme can help you prepare emotionally and practically for a more positive experience.
General Counselling & EMDR
I also offer counselling for anxiety, depression, trauma, and other life challenges beyond birth trauma.
Hypnotherapy
It can be helpful to use hypnotherapy in aspects of our work together. Have a look at Mels Services to experience a free quick relaxation and get a taster for how hypnotherapy might sound.
FAQs
If it's affecting you, it's enough. You don't need to have had a dramatic birth to experience trauma. Your feelings are valid.
You can be grateful your baby is healthy AND traumatized by the birth. These feelings can exist together. It's not about the outcome - it's about your experience.
With the right support, processing trauma helps it heal. We'll work at your pace in a safe environment. You're in control with my guidance and support.
It's never too late. I work with people weeks, months, or years after their birth. In fact, if time has gone by and you are still experiencing upset or distress, it’s a sign that you need a little help to move through it.
Talking to trusted friends and family can be really helpful in helping us process events, but sometimes we need more than the people around us can offer. Professional counselling provides support that is designed to help shift things when we are stuck, and when a counsellor has specialised in trauma therapy (like EMDR), and has an expertise in birth trauma, you are really increasing your chances of full recovery.
No - I work with anyone affected by birth trauma, including partners, those who've experienced pregnancy loss, professionals affected by traumatic births they've attended, and babies that have grown into adults that know that how they were born has negatively impacted their life.
Absolutely. Processing previous trauma while pregnant can help you prepare for a more positive birth experience.
I offer a free 20-minute consultation to discuss your needs and how I can help.
No. You can book directly with me. However, if you have severe symptoms, I may recommend you also see your GP for additional support.